- Do you know how to recognize a man when he is going to say something intelligent?
His sentence begins with “My wife told me that …”
____________________________A man knocks at his neighbor’s door.
The neighbor answers:
– Yes ?
– Hello, I come to see you because your dog has bitten my mother-in-law twice!
– Oh no! You’re not serious! I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again. It is not usually bad. Do you want to be compensated?
– I do not want to be compensated. I want to buy your dog!
3. A woman arrives in the kitchen and sees her husband with a fly squirt …
– What are you doing?
– I’m chasing flies …
“Did you kill them?”
– Yes, 3 males, 2 females
Intrigued, she asks him:
– How do you differentiate between females and males?
– 3 were on the can of beer, 2 on the phone.
4. A guy walks down the street and sees, hanging on the front door of a garden a sign: WARNING WICKED PARROT! And a little farther in the garden, he sees the parrot in question on a perch. Our bold fellow laughs at seeing the bird tied to its perch. Deciding to tempt the devil, he crosses the barrier and enters the garden.
Suddenly, the parrot starts shouting: “REX, ATTACK!!!” (Addressing the dog of the house)
5. A conversation between the schoolmistress and Toto:
“Madam, madam, can I be punished for something I have not done?”
“But of course not Toto, we’re not going to punish you for something you did not do.”
“Well, it’s okay … I did not do my homework yesterday!”